Saturday, 11 October 2014

I've not been feeling myself for quite a while now, and I'm putting it down to the fact that I need to make one or two major lifestyle adjustments.

...and by this I mean start exercising. Since my beloved Pilates class moved to mornings, right when I'm due to leave for work, I've just given up, and literally haven't done any exercise for so long. I'm starting to lose my self esteem, and want to get it back. I loved that class so much, and felt I was in the best shape of my life for doing it, so in my head I feel like nothing else will compare. It's a mind set I need to get out of. I need to get back into the gym, start swimming again, and also find another class that I will love just as much.

I don't eat horrendously, and try to make healthy choices where I can, but I just have a real weakness for sweet treats. Instead of having one chocolate hobnob with my cuppa, I have three. I don't need three, I just cant stop eating the hobnobs! So I need to start to adopt a healthier attitude towards food, and probably introduce a bit more fruit and veg into my diet. I'm thinking of going on a juice cleanse for a day or two after my mum goes home so it will be interesting to see if this helps.

I'm not a big drinker anyway. I've never been one to come home from work and fancy a glass of wine, or have a drink with dinner if i'm at home. I used to go out on a Friday/Saturday night back home and have a big night out with the girls, which would write me off the next day, but I barely drink anymore, especially since my kidney related stint in ICU. I have also found recently that I have a real intolerance to drink, possibly because my kidneys cant process it as well. Even one drink leaves me with an incurable migraine and sickness the next day, and sometimes the day after that too, which isn't normal at all. Because of this, I've made the decision to stop drinking altogether as it's just not worth feeling that way.

Sometimes a good old life de-clutter helps. Whether that be blitzing my room so I have tidy surroundings (tidy room, tidy mind) or having a cull on Facebook of anybody who brings me bad energy, it all helps to create a bit of inner calm. I have found that lately my social anxiety has been worse than ever - I've turned into an anxious, stressed, worried mess, and often prefer staying in than going out. I need to do what I can to calm myself down, so i'm thinking more pampering nights are on the cards! I'm also finding meditation before bed is helping, as this is when my mind is at it's most anxious.

Hopefully a combination of all of the above will help to create a more zen-like, healthy, happier Holly :)

*Image from WeHeartIt.

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